A Milspouse Once Again

I guess he just couldn't stay away.

In reality, we had gone back and forth about B joining the Navy Reserve after his separation from Active Duty. For various reasons, he decided to postpone any decision one way or another until we knew where we would land. He actually kept telling me that I should join it myself, and I was honestly starting to consider it. It would be nice to have something of "my own" I thought. But then I also thought that I would have to do a full 20 versus B's 11 years left for retirement. Why oh why didn't I do this when I was 23 and living in Norfolk?

{Source}

Well, now that we have landed ourselves somewhere, the decision needed to be made. Once B found out he could drill two hours away in Indianapolis, I think it sealed the deal. I can even tag along and just go hang out with my in-laws for the weekend if I feel like it. He signed the contract for three years. They threw a bonus at him, and he started telling me how much it was. I said "Yeah yeah, that's great, but when can we sign up for health insurance?"

Yes, this is a enormous blessing in the insurance department. His new job offers really crappy benefits that were going to cost and arm and a leg and still have a high deductible. I don't think his company even subsidizes the insurance since I found something similar online that I could just buy privately. The Reserve version of TRICARE insurance isn't free by any means, but it's pretty good in comparison to what we were offered.

He's actually gone for his first drill weekend right now. I was a bit concerned about doing church on my own for the first time since Cora was born, so I called up his aunt. Of course she wants to help hold the baby during mass! Living near family, even if it is family I married into, is such a godsend and something I should learn to utilize more often.

One weekend a month and two weeks a year. That's how we're doing the military life now, and I'm happy about it.

Where Life Takes Us Next

B accepted a job offer!

He is starting his new position on November 1.

He'll be doing something at a power plant, but not a nuclear power plant.

I'm sure you guys don't care much about that, you just want to know where we're going!

Well . . .

It's in the Eastern Time Zone. (I'm actually kind of bummed about this; I loved Central Time!)

It's the second-largest city in its state.

One of us graduated high school about 2 hours away from it.

We will need winter clothes to live there.

It is the 74th largest city in the United States with a population of 255,824.

It is known as The Summit City.

It has a large Burmese ex-pat community.  (I heard that on NPR, lol.)

We are moving to . . .

Fort Wayne, Indiana!

Yup.  Sort of back home for B.  He went to elementary school in this city, and his grandmother and various extended family live there. I finally get my "village" to help raise my child, so that's a plus.  However, I now have to dress my child in pants. And a jacket.  I have to learn how to drive in the snow.  No beach anywhere near, but I think there are lakes which you can actually swim in (no gators!).

As for how his job search went?  Well, I had previously mentioned the headhunters and job conferences and all that jazz.  Those amounted to squat for him.  This job was found the old-fashioned way: connections.  His cousin is an engineer up there (at GM, where he'll be working as well) and blasted his résumé out to anywhere she saw fit. B will be working for a contract company, but within the GM truck plant.

I suppose you want to know our timeline, too?  Yeah, I knew that when it happened it would happen quickly, which is why I quit my volunteer job right when he went on terminal leave.  We're moving NEXT FRIDAY (in one week!).  Holy crap.  The Navy is moving us; we had to pay an extra $100 or so because it's slightly farther than his hometown.  They're packing us up Thursday and the moving truck is coming Friday.  Our stuff will go in storage while we look for a 3-bedroom apartment.  We don't plan on buying a house immediately because I don't like being rushed into major life-altering, debt-inducing purchases.  We currently are debt-free, and will be taking a pay-cut for the initial part of this job (and the health insurance is flippin' expensive!), so we can probably get a better house in a better location later anyway.  We'll hopefully have a house in a year, but no rush. Renting has generally been good for us.  Maybe we're nuts, but we like  having other people mow the grass (and shovel the snow!).

So that's our story. Farewell, Navy.  Hello, Hoosiers!

7 Quick Takes (Wimpy Hurricane Edition)

— 1 —

My mom was here last weekend, and it was nice to have some extra hands.  We took Baby Cora to her first baseball game (the lovely and brand-spankin'-new Pensacola Blue Wahoos), then we went to the beach on Saturday.  She also offered to babysit so that B and I could have a date night.  It was only our second one we've had since baby was born 7 months ago.  It was such a nice night out that I wanted to take a walk after dinner.  We went up to the campus of the University of West Florida and walked around a bit.  It was kinda cool that we probably still looked like college kids!  Well, at least in my mind anyway.  In reality, we still got home around 10 and were in bed shortly after.  We may have looked the part, but I think our party-all-night college days are more than over.

— 2 —

Today is B's last official day of Active Duty.  When he wakes up tomorrow, he will be a full civilian!  Weird, but not weird at the same time.  This shore tour has felt very "civilian-esque," and the building he worked in here was mostly staffed by civilians, so there were no tear-filled goodbyes to a wardroom or whatever.  The stinky thing is that tomorrow his title not only changes to "civilian," but also to "unemployed."  He has been on terminal leave for the past two weeks, and one thing I noticed this week when I did laundry was a complete lack of socks.  We usually have a big pile to sort and match, but this week I think there was only one pair.

— 3 —

Who else is excited about college football starting?!  Yeah, I didn't think I was alone on that.  I'm not sure the baby is going to be happy with me changing her outfit in the middle of the day tomorow, but she needs to start off in a Notre Dame onesie (B's alma mater), and then change into one of her many Georgia outfits (complete with red and black headband and flower) for that game.  I've already been teaching her the "Gooooo Dawgs, Sic 'em!" cheer, and she laughs at the barking part.  (Okay, who wouldn't laugh at that?)

— 4 —

Oh, did you know there was a hurricane that hardly touched us?  Yeah, they closed schools here on Monday and Tuesday, and it was completely unnecessary.  There was some wind, some rain, a tornado watch or two.  But honestly we fared much worse in the flooding we had back in June.  We still didn't leave the house much, even though it was pretty much a non-event.  Our hurricane supplies consisted of a big bag of M&M's, which we've almost finished.

— 5 —

Also, did you know the Paralympics started this week?  Check out this video of swimming.  The guy who wins has no arms, and just bumps his head into the wall to finish the race.

If you want to check out some more Paralympic action, try this site or the YouTube channel.  If you're wondering about the classification system (like S4 or S11), see this handy guide.  Or this one.

— 6 —

Our baby finally rolled from back to tummy.  Yes, her roll the other way was over a month ago, but this little gal hates being on her tummy with a passion!  So once she grabbed the toy she was going for, she swiftly rolled the other way back onto her back.  That being said, no, she hasn't started crawling of any sort.  Less child-proofing for us, so that's fine with me.

— 7 —

Why are McDonald's fries soooo good?  I rarely ever go to McD's (like maybe 3 times a year at most), but I had a coupon for something free that expired today, so that was my lunch.  And, oh, the fries!  Good thing I have willpower.


Check out more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary.

Lying In Wait

Well, B is officially on terminal leave from the Navy now.  He's getting a whopping two weeks before his active duty ends.  Yes, that is on the low side, due to a trifecta of factors beyond his control that worked against him.  (He'll be selling back the rest of his leave.)  Oh well.  He is still waffling on his decision to join the Active Reserve and will make that decision once we know where we're going.

As for that, no, you haven't missed any big announcements around these parts.  He does not have a job lined up yet.  Since so many people ask me, even though it's more of his business than mine, I'm going to explain how separating from the Navy looks like for an LT submarine officer with a B.S. in Engineering.  He's not going back to school.  He wants an actual engineering job, but is also open to a shipyard job or a contracting job.  And  I just want him to be happy and not deal with rotating shift work.  We're not staying here in Pensacola, as we don't really love it here and there are no jobs in his field anyway.  Our location is rather flexible, but we want to stay between Maryland and Texas (and stretching west to include B's home state of Indiana).  That's a good 20% of the U.S., so I'm hoping it's doable.

He signed up with two different headhunting agencies.  These agencies can connect him to a lot of companies he's never heard of who are looking for people with his type of experience.  These agencies also sponsor some of those job conferences, like the one he went to in Houston.  At those, he does a handful of preliminary interviews and then the company will hopefully ask for a follow-up interview.  The follow-up interviews are interesting, as the company will pay for him to fly out to wherever they are and interview.  Hopefully he will get more of these soon, as his Navy job was busier in the summer and made it hard for him to take the necessary leave to go to these.  Yes, he is also applying to jobs on his own, so don't ask about that.

He will be attending a few more job conferences and hopefully flying out to lots more interviews.  We'll be staying here in Pensacola until he lands a good position.  We planned and saved for this, but it still doesn't make it ideal.  We have to pay for our own health insurance soon, and I'm already annoyed at the thought of that (the military version of COBRA is super-expensive, by the way).  I actually quit my volunteer gig this past week, as I need to be ready to leave at the drop of a hat.

B is hitting the ground running on his job search now, but here I am, just waiting.  Taking care of the baby, supporting my husband, and praying that the wait is short.


(If you previously missed my thoughts about him leaving the military, check out this guest post I did at Many Waters.)

Please do not leave job-hunting advice for my husband in the comments, unless you personally know someone at the most perfect company in the world for him.  Thank you.

7 Quick Takes (Olympic Fever Edition)

— 1 —

B and I have been having fun keeping up with the Olympics.  He's a lot more into it than I thought he would be!  I think he's watched about every sport that has come on.  He likes to whine and moan about some of it, though.  I sometimes agree.  One thing he hates is swimming.  I get this.  Why is someone who won a gabillion medals in swimming the "greatest Olympic athlete"?  You can win a gabillion medals in swimming because it has a gabillion events.  (17 events, I just counted.)  But what about those sports that only offer one medal?  I personally love women's beach volleyball, and I think May-Treanor/Walsh is one of the greatest teams of all Olympic history.  And what about skeet shooter Kim Rhode who has won gold in five consecutive Olympics?

— 2 —

Speaking of beach volleyball, can I just say that Kerri Walsh is amazing?  Did you know this gal popped out TWO kids between the last Olympics and this one?

Source

I remember hearing Jillian Michaels say she didn't want to "ruin her body" with pregnancy.  Um, I think Kerri Walsh just proved that it does not ruin your body if you don't let it.  (I can personally vouch for this, as I have a similar body type to Jillian and have lost every ounce of pregnancy weight and even a pound extra to boot.)

— 3 —

Going back to swimming, what in the world is the point of the butterfly stroke?  Why would you ever use this stroke in swimming?  Freestyle is the fastest, breaststroke is an endurance stroke, backstroke probably has the least risk of drowning . . . but butterfly?  To look like a fish?  I don't get it.

— 4 —

I really enjoyed this YouTube video that shows the evolution of uneven bars routines over the year.  Neat, huh?


— 5 — Did you catch my guest post over at Many Waters earlier this week?  I talked about my views on my husband leaving active duty military service, which you can read here.  His replacement is checking in today, which means it's turnover time.  Less than 30 days left until his end date.  Yeep.  And, no, we still don't know where his job search is going to land us. — 6 — I've crossed two items off my 101 list lately.  The first was that I got my butt back to that farmer's market and finally bought a few items:

Flowers, local raw honey, and some yummy bread.  Total was under $20.

The honey was from a church friend's yard, so that was cool too.  You can check out their website here. — 7 — And yesterday I blogged about how I made ice cream from scratch without an ice cream maker.

Check out how I did it here. —— And check out more quick takes at Conversion Diary!

On Leaving This Crazy Lifestyle

I've mentioned it before, but my husband is leaving the active duty military very soon. (Terminal leave starts Aug. 17).  I have a guest post up today over at Many Waters, explaining my views on the matter.  Here's a taste of it:

My husband’s job search has been a big adventure, but I, personally, have very little to do with it.  So instead I want to focus on what his military separation means to me.  For one, I can only call myself a Navy submariner’s wife for just a few more months. It all goes away August 31. For the past few years, I’ve let his military service define our relationship and also myself . . . read the rest here

And if you found me from Poe's blog, welcome!  If you're wondering, we still don't know where we're headed next!

Our Quick Trip to Houston

Last week, Baby Cora and I joined my husband B in a trip to the fourth-largest city in the United States.  We had a few reasons for traveling to Houston, but the primary one was that B was attending a job conference where he got to interview with five different companies.  There are tons of engineering jobs in Houston, so we know there is a possibility we could end up living there after B's military separation.  None of us had been to that city before, so it was a good idea to check it out and make sure we didn't hate it.

It also helped that we knew Cora does well on road trips.  This was her third road trip, and she's only 5 months old!  She has now been to 10 states.  We also got to meet up with some family, as we each have a cousin living in Houston.  Business cards were exchanged and advice was given over meals at the Rainforest Cafe and the Cheesecake Factory.  And I got to "talk shop" in my own way with their wives who fawned over the baby.

While B was off doing his thing, Cora and I explored the city a bit.  Since we were staying by the Galleria mall, we wandered around there.  (Bonus points because it was indoors, as Houston doesn't have the benefit of the coastal breeze we have here in Pensacola.)

Cora, "enjoying" watching the ice skaters at the mall

After being in the mall for awhile and not buying anything other than lunch, we headed to a landmark around the corner known as the Water Wall.

It's a wall.  of water.

Lived up to its name.  Also had a nice mist coming off of it.

 At the suggestion of reader Erika, we ate dinner at Pappasito's for some yummy Tex-Mex.

Why yes, that is a Sangria, since you asked.

On the second full day there, Cora turned exactly 5 months old!  We usually do a picture on the glider with her "birth-stat elephant," so we brought it with us.

"Please tell me about a time you had difficulty with a subordinate, Mr. W."

As B went into his interviews with his fancy suit and power tie, Cora and I went to explore downtown Houston.  It was H-O-T that day, so I found some indoorsy things, like going to an observation deck on the 60th floor of a skyscraper.

Helloooooo, Houston!

We actually did walk around outside a bit, though, and found this adorable park called Discovery Green.

It had a big splash area where a bunch of kids were playing in the water.  It took every piece of my restraint not to join them.  But I did find this other thing with water I could stick my head under.

It felt heavenly.

Overall, the trip was good, barring one misadventure with a parking meter that refused to take my credit card and then ate my dollar and went to sleep.  But a kind stranger bailed me out, and I ended up actually liking the next (perfectly-functioning) parking meter I used.

How could I not love a parking meter that runs on solar power?  I guess the "Energy Capital of the World" really does live up to its name!

The good news of the trip is that we didn't hate it!  I wouldn't call it the perfect place to live, but we didn't hate it.

Some Life Updates

I figured it's about time to just let y'all know what's going on around here.

Last week, we celebrated a lot!

First, B's 29th birthday was on the 8th.

Those are birthday brownies from a box.  I'm not super-mom over here.

Then on Thursday evening, we drove back to my hometown in Georgia.  That means that Cora gets to cross another state off her list!  Friday was spent sinking a bunch of money into repairing my car (new alternator and water pump, ugh), and then on Saturday we had not one, but TWO big celebrations of faith.

My nephew/godson received his First Communion:

That's him kneeling in the first row.  I got a video of the whole thing even though I wasn't supposed to :)

And then that same afternoon, my precious baby girl was baptized!

She's wearing the gown that both my sister and I were baptized in!

We did two cakes, one from Publix for my nephew, and I decorated the one for Cora.  It's not awesome, but I think I did an okay job.

The more important part is that it was YUMMY and got gobbled up very quickly!

B had his D.C. trip early this week, so Cora and I dropped him off at the airport on Monday morning, and went on an adventure!  I did this last year on the same weekend after my niece's baptism and regretted going to somewhere a bunch of field trip students were.  So this year I steered clear of touristy places and a friend joined Cora and me for our first IKEA trip.

I wish I lived near one so I could just go there for breakfast all the time!

I got a handful of toys and toy storage and picture frames, and it was great!  This is totally my type of store.

After that side trip, I had to drive back to Pensacola on my own with baby.  It really wasn't so bad.  She's gotten a lot more efficient at nursing, so we just took our time and didn't do bottles since I would have had to pump if we did.  We only made two stops, so it worked out just fine!

Other than our travels, the big deal in our household right now is B's job hunt.  He signed up with another headhunting agency, which I think has had someone call him almost every day.  He's going to a big job conference in Baltimore next week, where he'll be interviewing with a handful of companies he matches.  If you're the prayin' kind, please add him to your list next Tuesday!  It absolutely freaks me out that wherever we end up moving to in just a few short months could be our FOREVER home.  I want him to have a good job and all, but I guess my role as wife and mom is to make sure we end up somewhere that has a good environment for families and preferably good schools.

And just because she's stinkin' cute, here's a recent picture of Cora:

the start of our military farewell

Last week I got what will hopefully be the last "military surprise" dumped on me.  In the grand scheme of things, it's really not a big deal at all, but it has changed some plans around.

B put in his official resignation letter with the Navy last week.  We knew this was coming; we planned on this.  However, when he submitted it, he was told that he has to get out in August.  We have been telling everyone November 2012 for the past year or so.  I know it's only a matter of months, but it was still a bit of a surprise.  He even asked to be extended a few more months, and the powers that be weren't having it.

Discharging from the military is simultaneously frightening, liberating, the most natural thing in the world, and apparently the most unnatural thing around this base.  The base we are currently at seems to have two types of people: those who just joined the military (currently in A-school or flight school), and those who are only a few years from retirement (currently teaching/commanding A-school and flight school).  For the record, B works at a command with a ton of civilians, and it's not A-school or flight school.  I've met very few people in that mid-range level, but I love it when I find them.  It usually happens around here that when I tell people, "He's getting out," they respond, "He's retiring?"  At our last base, I watched oodles of men and women separate from the service, and no one batted an eye because they knew how much it sucks to be on a ship.  I guess here they're still bright-eyed and bushy-tailed?

B and I have gone back and forth about him joining the Reserves, and after a talk with an O-6 from the aviation world who discouraged it for submarine officers, I think we both agreed that we will be fine without those headaches.  (In case you're wondering, B has a degree in electrical engineering and can also do nuclear engineering thanks to the Navy.)  When I first brought up the Reserves, B told me I should join it.  I'll keep that in my back pocket if times get rough--I think I'd make a good Reservist!

We purposely planned to have our first child while on this shore tour.  The timing worked out right, he's home all but 3 predictable days a month, the pre-natal visits and birth are free, and we were ready.  I'm glad that our plan is panning out, but the fact that we will have a child adds a bit of worry to the date bump-up.  B doesn't want to start a new job until October, so I'm trying to factor in the cost of insurance to our 2012 budget.  If it was just the two of us, we'd probably just go without.  It's not looking very cheap right now, but hopefully we'll get some answers when he goes to his Transition Assistance class on base.

You may have noticed that I rarely post about the military on my blog.  I started this whole thing to pass some time while he was deployed last year, but everything went rather swimmingly so there wasn't too much to vent about.  Plus, we'd already been through it before (with me as a girlfriend), and it was ten times worse.  I purposely never branded this thing as a "milspouse" blog, since I've known that B wouldn't be career military since the moment I met him.  I also realize that I will have spent just as much time out on my own in civilian land (post-college) as I have under the protective cocoon of the Navy.  That's about three years with each.  That fact won't stop me from missing the amazing perks we get around these parts, namely the commissary, free healthcare, and a free gym.

One thing I realized I really won't miss are the military traditions.  I didn't grow up in a military town, I don't have any close family who made a career of it (except my grandfather, but he died before I was born), I didn't know the difference between officer and enlisted until meeting B, and frankly, B just isn't into the traditions, so I guess I'm not either.  He wouldn't even take me to the military ball once we got married (we went to one in Virginia when we were dating, and it was pretty lame so I don't blame him).  I've only seen B dolled up in his dress whites once in our entire 5-year relationship.  I'll still have a soft spot for submarines, especially women on subs, but that will probably be all I take with me.

Oh, and this great picture of him with the Blue Angels from yesterday morning:

B is in khakis and black jacket on the right.

Since this post is semi-appropriate for the upcoming Veterans Day, feel free to see some thoughts and research on the semantics of that word (and whether it applies to B and other active-duty submariners) from a post I did last year.

While I'm ready to tackle the civilian world, I'm still wary about the next place we live possibly being our "forever" home.  But more on that later!