But I'm definitely welcoming GD if that's the worst of my troubles. See, for most of this pregnancy, I have had a 'sinking ship' kinda feeling. With Cora, all of my worries melted away after we got a heartbeat at the 10-week ultrasound. This time, it took until the 20-week one and some signs of movement before I started to feel at peace. I actually felt movement 'late' for a 2nd pregnancy, so I wasn't sure what was going on before that ultrasound (turns out, anterior placenta). I had about 9 weeks of optimism, and now I'm back to the doomsday vibes.
|This snowman didn't even last a day. |
This picture is single-handedly keeping my hopes up for a good winter.
I also feel like I've been so distant from my kid in her final days of undivided attention. Some of it is just natural, as B is the one who takes her and picks her up from daycare most days. My husband has been especially wonderful with Cora, even though she has hit the 'threenager' stage big-time (her birthday is next week). She has started waking in the middle of the night for various reasons (last night was "I want my mommmmyyyy!"), and he is the one who deals with it. What a rock star.
I'm not really sure where I was going with this post (do thoughts on a page really need to go anywhere? that's so American, isn't it?). But I'm tired and sorta sick (hello, phlegmy cough that I can't take anything for right now). The baby is kicking, which I know is a good sign and has quelled my fears in the past. Maybe I'll wake up tomorrow and feel amazing again. Lord knows I want to.